Tuesday, December 2, 2014

What Does "Blue" Mean to You?

Jonathon GreenSlang lexicographer. Author: Green's Dictionary of Slang
There seems to be no hard-and-fast reason why blue, which has been used in this way since the 16th century, means depressed. Perhaps it suggests lifelessness (although blue in the face can suggest an excess of emotion) and if so there is a possible link to an earlier use, which the OED defines as meaning "Livid, leaden-coloured, as the skin becomes after a blow, from severe cold, from alarm."

Blue is So MY Color!
Lethargic, uninterested, intolerant, alone, empty and just all around miserable. That's the state I've been in for the past two days. I am at that stage where you do the questioning thing "When's it gonna get better?" "How long until the darkness passes this time?"

I'm exhausted from these episodes both mentally, physically and spiritually. 
Trying to stay positive, but find myself so completely uninspired to do so.
Going to summon all my strength and lose my thoughts in some meditation.
Tomorrow could be more of the same so I'm preparing myself for that as well.
Simply getting out of bed and making it to work (too down to use public trans and currently beating myself up for foolishly spending money on taxis) has been an incredible drain.

I hate feeling like this. I hate that this has been my life since adolescence. 

I have an idea for a support group....working out the details and hoping to bring it to fruition right after the start of the new year. Being wrapped up in a cloudy funk and being on the verge of shutting down completely sure is not helping however!
Anyway, hoping to share this idea with all of you soon. Praying that it may be something that could work nationwide for those with chronic depression.

Sending my love to you and asking for the same. May you find your inner strength and come through whatever hardship you may be facing. 

Don't give up!!